Pietrisycamollaviadelrechiotemexity

patpatpat:

valquizno:

Something Real: HOW MANY UC STUDENTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB?

UCLA: One: She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.

CAL: Seventy-six. One to change the light bulb, fifty to protest the light bulb’s right not to change, and twenty-five to hold a counter protest.

UCSD: Five. 1 to hold the bulb and 4 to start smoking weed until the room spins.

UCI: Eleven. 1 to change the bulb and ten to sit around watching because honestly, what else is there to do at Irvine past 10pm??

UCR: Three. 1 to steal the bulb, another to drive the getaway car, and the last to call all his friends to throw the celebration party on a Tuesday night.

UCSB: Seven. 1 to screw the bulb and 6 to screw each other.

UC Davis: Zero. There is no electricity in Davis.

UC Merced: Two. One to hold the bulb while the other calls his friend asking for help in figuring out this “new college thing.”

UCSC: None since they are living in the forest

Oh davis..

(via adieu-pasteque)